2023 The Year of Freedom

In 2016 I wrote about “Doors”. It was a season of change where God had closed doors that I didn’t think He would close and doors I didn’t want to be closed. Four years later, in 2020 many people experienced the closing of doors. In 2016 I talked about the light shifting to illuminate different directions as doors opened and closed. The last couple of years have been filled with closing doors and shifting lights. It’s not always God who closes a door and some of the doors that closed have been doors of oppression. We have an enemy that wants to kill, steal, and destroy, and the last few years he has done just that. Many of us have felt and are still feeling the oppression of those doors.

I wrote about how God will use our time in the hallway, regardless of who put us there, to prepare us for the next open door. I fully believe there have been battles in the heavens over the doors that are about to open for God’s people. As many of us have been waiting, Holy Spirit has revealed windows, illuminating things we were meant to see. Some of those things we may have knew and just needed reminded of; other things we needed to see before stepping through the next door.

As we get ready to step into a new year I have been praying for a word for the year. I don’t do resolutions, but I do seek one word from God that defines the year to come. Some of the words I have been given in the past are “restore”, “faith”, “purge”, and “stand”. This year for 2023, it’s “freedom”. As we have endured the oppression in the hallway, God has been preparing us for the “freedom” that the next door is going to bring. I believe there are things behind that door that we cannot even imagine. We are going to see personal freedoms and corporate freedoms released.

There will be freedom for our relationships: friends, spouses, children, extended family, etc. Freedom for our finances: God desires for us to live an abundant, prosperous life.

 Freedom for our ambitions: new goals will be released, new directions, new purposes, and new dreams.

Freedom with our health. New revelations are coming regarding health. With a glorified church comes healing and miracles.

Freedom for energy. As governments oppress energy sources, God has other plans. His people will not have to worry about hot or cold weather.

 Freedom for our faith; we are about to witness things from God that this world has not yet seen. God will have His glorified church and we will see His church do even greater things than Jesus did.

As we walk into the next year God is going to begin opening the doors He has been preparing us to walk through. Some may challenge us to step into an unknown but do so with boldness. God has not given us a spirit of fear, but of power and of love and of a sound mind. Other doors, may be doors of restoration, where He desires to restore what the enemy has tried to steal. Be careful to not put your expectations of the restoration in a box. When God restores, He doesn’t just return it to what it once was; He improves it and makes it better.

A New Journey Begins

I am on the cusp of a breakthrough when it comes to my writer’s block. I feel God telling me to write. But where and what about? 

Years ago, I started this blog and I never really pushed for readers or an audience. I thought that God would get it to those who needed to see it. I'm currently reading a book by Jen Trindale, and she writes about destiny, and how it is something me need to fight for and protect. We have an enemy whose purpose is to steal, kill, and destroy. His main target is our destiny and our purpose. If he can derail us from what God planned for us, it slows down the advancement of the Kingdom. Several times over the past few years, as I struggled with writer’s block, I looked back at some of my past blogs, and I see how relevant today than they were back then. When I was writing them, many of them were directed at the church, and I felt as if I were being judgmental at the time. I would ask myself, “who am I to judge”. Much of what I wrote was written out of personal conviction as well as observation and what I was witnessing in the church. Reading some of my post in view of today, I can’t help but look at them as a warning. If the church would have seen the things I wrote about then, would things be different now? There is a great awakening occurring. For me I was awake a long time ago and I think it was because of the journey God took me on during those early years of writing my blog.

My pen has been silent for the past few years. I would try to write but nothing would come. Now I feel it releasing and God has more to say through the pen in my hand. It may mean that we revisit what He inspired in the past, only with new eyes, or He will take us on a whole new journey.

Who wants to join me on this journey?

Restoration Reboot- Restoring the Passion

 

Conviction hit me this morning as I was reading through some of my past posts, especially the reboot of “The Air I Breathe”. Putting aside the words of the post, I asked how “have I slid back so far?” As I read the words that I wrote many years ago I see a passion, yet currently, I’m not living with that passion. I have yet again, become wrapped in a blanket of complacency. Jason and I switched churches this past year and our new pastor has been preaching a lot about blind Bartimaeus (Mark 10:46-52). As Jesus went through Jericho and was in the crowds Bartimaeus passionately cried out to Him, “Jesus, Son of David, have mercy on me.” When Jesus stopped, stood still, and called back to him, Bartimaeus threw off his cloak. I realized this morning that I have been wearing a cloak of complacency and I feel Jesus calling me to throw off the cloak and answer His question of what I want Him to do for me.  

There are many things I could ask Jesus to do – restore our nation, restore our finances, restore health, etc., but more than anything I want Jesus to restore my passion. I want to hear His voice more. I want to be in His presence more. I want to see a wave of His presence sweep this nation. I want His body to throw off the blankets of politics, Covid, and division, and to run to Jesus, sit at His feet, and watch Him do what He desires on this earth. I want to hear my marching orders and for Him to direct my steps.

Each year I pray for a word to define the upcoming year, and a couple of weeks ago I thought that word would have something to do with the events of the last two years. Instead, my word for 2022 is "PASSION". There have been prophetic voices calling 2022 “the year for you” and they have said it will be the “year of spoils” and reward. Those spoils only come from a passionate pursuit of God and a passionate pursuit to see His will done on earth as it is in Heaven. I pray that God not only restores my passion but the passion of His people. A passion to return to their first love, remembering all He has done for us, to rest in His embrace and to be His hands and feet to this lost and hurting world.

The Air I Breathe- Reboot

It has been a long time since I have written. I have spent the last two years pursuing my Associates Degree and in January I will be continuing on for my bachelor’s with a major in Sociology. For the past 3 months I have been feeling like something was missing and this morning when I was looking over some past blogs to get inspired, I came across one I wrote in 2013- “Making Room for God to Become the Air You Breathe.”  After reading it, I realized not only how far my writing has come, but I realize how much I have been suffocating the past few months.  I am posting a reboot to remind myself that we need to make Him the air we breathe. (Sorry I had to edit the grammar. I couldn’t believe I had published it with that many errors.) 

I have learned, that regardless of how much we go to church and pray, we can still suffocate if we don’t breathe Him in daily. This means we need to be in the Word daily and worship daily. I was spending time listening to podcasts in the car, and I would do quick, one to two verse devotions, but I wasn’t taking those deep, full breaths of Him that I needed. I invite you to reboot by taking a slow, deep breath of His goodness and mercy for all of us. 

  “Making Room for God to Become the Air You Breathe.” 

"Making room for God to do as He pleases and then cooperating with Him is the greatest thing we can do to see an increase in signs and wonders" - Bill Johnson.

The song "I Need You More" by Jesus Culture has the lyrics "I need You more... more than the air I breathe, more than the song I sing, more than my next heartbeat, more than anything.:"

God desires for us to hunger after Him. He wants us to put Him, above all else, in our lives. I have learned on my journey with Him that He MUST come first. He IS the air I breathe and the water I thirst for. Without air and water, we die. When I begin to let other things take me away from my daily time with Him, I feel like I am dying. When I look to Him as the air I breathe and the water I drink, it makes it easy for me to put aside the things of the world and spend time with Him.

 But that's not enough. We don't stop what we are doing to breathe, we breathe as we are doing. I want to be so immersed in His presence that a minute doesn't go by without Him being acknowledged. I want my actions to permeate with His love and presence.

In Luke 5:1-11 Jesus had just finished a night of miraculous signs and when He told Simon Peter, James and John to cast out their nets after not catching anything all night they obeyed. Out of their obedience, when they were tired from working all night, they themselves were granted a miraculous catch that almost sunk two boats. Jesus then gave them the invitation to leave everything and follow Him.

What is it in our lives that keeps us from dropping everything to follow Him? I believe it's the same thing that the disciples struggled with - fear and unworthiness. Jesus wouldn't call us if HE believed us to be unworthy, so are we going to call Him a liar and agree with the enemy?

2 Corinthians 5:21 says, "God made Him who had no sin to be sin for us, so that in Him, we might become the righteousness of God". If you have accepted Christ as your savior, you have become the righteousness of God, this makes you worthy of all that He has for you.

As for fear; 2 Timothy 1:7 says, "For God did not give us a spirit of fear, but of power, and of love and of sound mind.”

It is time for the Church, the Bride of Christ, to step into our true inheritance, to lay our lives down for Christ. Invite Him to be the air you breathe, and as you go about your day breathing Him in, He will permeate your life till those around you begin to see and feel the love of God. Invite Him to partner with you in all you do; at work, at home, at school, and at play. Wherever God has placed you on this earth let Him reign there.

Complacency

 Complacency is like a gray blanket that covers us, and though it seems warm and comfortable, it keeps the joy and passion out of our lives. We get so caught up in the day-to-day, that we don't even realize when we have wrapped ourselves in this blanket. It comes into our lives like a blanket of fog, covering the landscaping and hiding the beauty.

A few years ago, I recognized how I had allowed myself to be wrapped up, and I threw off the blanket. I told myself I would not allow myself to be wrapped up in it again. However, just like you can't walk in the mud without getting muddy, you can't constantly be around complacent people without becoming complacent. I recognize, yet again, I have allowed the complacency blanket into my life. It is a daily struggle to keep it off and at times, I grow weary. I know God has us where we are supposed to be for this season, but there is a strong longing for something more. More of God and His Glory to be manifested in and through our lives.

There are so many times I want to go up to people, grab them by the shoulders, shake them, and say, "Don't you realize there is more than this!" I have written before about tasting and hungering for more and I feel as if there is a famine happening. Not that God is withholding- quite the contrary, He desires more than anything for His people to step out of the way and say,"whatever You want to do, do it."

In reality, they are covered with the blanket of complacency that deceives them into believing that this is all there is. They don't even know what they are missing. To experience God's presence so thick in a room that you can't even stand. To feel joy so overwhelming that your stomach muscles hurt for days from laughing so hard. To witness His will being carried out when people are set free, restored to health and sound mind, and relationships are restored. To rest in a "peace which surpasses all understanding". I thank God that He has given me a taste of these things and I will continue to hold on to the promises He has given and throw off the blanket of complacency. I will long for the day when these things become an everyday occurrence, not just a scattered moment.

I am convicted that it is part my responsibility. Am I walking out my daily life for the Kingdom? These things can only happen when lives are lived fully surrendered to Him. How am I doing? How are you doing? Are we allowing ourselves to be wrapped in the blanket of complacency, or are we living every moment in full surrender to Him?

Doors

God has been leading me down a new path and often times as one door opens another closes. That was what 2016 was for me; it was a season of change and challenges. 

Sometimes, it is painful when a door is shut. Doors are a lot like the obstacles in our lives;sometimes they are there because God wants them there and sometimes they are there to hinder us on our journey. Whether God has shut the door or not, He can use the circumstance to help us see in a new light. When a door is open it illuminates certain things and when that door is shut, the light shifts to illuminate other things for us to focus on. So it is with the doors in our lives.The patterns of light shifts and change around us lighting the new areas that need exploring. Would we dare venture to explore those areas if they were not illuminated for us? When a door is closed to us we no longer see the path we were on; we must move on to the new adventure and a new path. 

There are times when one door is shut, but a new one opens. There may even be more than one open and sometimes there are none at all; we are left standing in an empty room - waiting. I have learned, over the years to not rush into the next door. There are times of growth in the hallway and in the waiting that prepares us for the journey through the next door. It is also in the waiting, when there is more than one door open, that we can seek Gods will in which door to walk through. Not every door is opened by God. We must wait on Him to illuminate the way for us. 

What ever the situation, it's never easy to do new things, but it is in the challenge that we discover our strengths. It is in our weaknesses that we lean on God's strength. As I walk through these new doors I may not see the path in front of me, but I hold to the promises that God has given me and I take the next step in obedience. As I do this I get closer to the promises and closer to God. 

Restoring Justice - Olivia Noble

In my last post I talked about obstacles and one of the biggest times you may run into an obstacle is when you are moving out in what the Lord wants you to do. I have to laugh at how the enemy thinks he can actually stop what God has set in motion. I have been privileged to watch God move in and through my daughter's life. God has set things in motion in her life and I just wanted to give others the chance to partner with her and see God move the financial obstacle by allowing her to share with you a portion of what He is doing.

Justice
Has the word justice ever made you sick to your stomach? If so, you are not alone. Justice has always come across as a harsh word to me, it’s always been something that partners with punishment and the loving side of me use to cower at the sound of the word.  Until I actually realized what Justice is. Justice is the restoration of every violation of love. When true justice comes, healing follows, love invades, and the broken become better than they’ve ever been. My name is Olivia Noble and this March I get the incredible opportunity of bringing justice to Ecuador. Now, before I tell you about this awesome opportunity let me tell you a little about me. I am the daughter of this wonderful blog owner and thanks to her I have had the incredible opportunity of growing up in the church. Right after high school I was incredibly blessed with the acceptance to Bethel School of Supernatural Ministry. Boy has it been a life changing experience, and I am not even done with my second year. It continues to blow my mind how much there is for us to discover. God is so vast that we get to spend all of eternity seeking out his goodness and discovering his incredible nature. There is always more of him to discover and the beauty in this truth is that as you discover Him, He develops more of you.

Ever since I was little I’ve had the biggest desire to love on the broken, the forgotten, and the outcast and as I’ve discovered more of God he has revealed to me how this part of my heart is set on bringing justice. So let’s get back to the trip. In March me and a team of students will be sent out from Bethel to bring justice to Ecuador. We will be hanging out in youth prisons, walking the streets of the red light district, visiting orphanages, assisting the mentally disabled and so much more. Every day will be filled with the restoration of every violation of love. The most beautiful part about it is we will be partnering with a branch of Expression 58 that is stationed in Ecuador. Even though the team and I will only be able to love on the people for a little over the week that we are there, we get to connect them to people who have the resources to make life change sustainable. Our love won’t leave with us.

So help partner with me to bring justice to Ecuador. Every prayer counts and every donation is appreciated. Whether you’re partnering with a simple  prayer or a donation, it matters. It’s more than just partnering with travel plans, it’s partnering with a move of God, and when you are in tune with God, life is just that much more blessed.

We get to bring Justice to Ecuador. It’s more than just for one week, it’s more than just for one trip, because justice is so much more than one word.

For donations click the link below

https://trips.ibethel.org/transactions/new/14989

Obstacles

Obstacles are a part of life. How we approach them and our feelings about them, determines how much the obstacle will impact us. Obstacles come in different sizes, making some easier to overcome, while others seem like impossible situations. 

Lately, it seems I am surrounded by obstacles. I recently started college, after spending the past 25 years raising my kids and taking care of my family and it hasn't been easy. I expected it to be hard, however, obstacles. I did not expect, popped up around me. I looked at each obstacle as a challenge and asked myself how bad do I want this dream? 

I feel like this season of obstacles is not just for me but for others who are contending for Kingdom things. Each obstacle placed in front of us is for a purpose. If the enemy put the obstacle there, he did so to stop us. Look at the story of Joseph; His brothers had sold him into slavery; years later they were reunited and after the death of their father, his brothers were still afraid that Joseph was holding a grudge against them. Joseph wasn't holding a grudge though and said to them in Genesis 50:20, "But as for you, you meant evil against me; but God meant it for good, in order to bring it about as it is this day, to save many people." Joseph had to go through many obstacle to get to that place of authority but God took each obstacle, which was meant to harm him, and turned it into good. God can use the obstacles of the enemy to build our faith, for if we have "faith the size of a mustard seed, we will say, 'move from here to there,' and it will move, and nothing will be impossible for you." (Matthew 17:20) When we overcome the obstacle, it makes us stronger and the enemy weaker.

Sometimes, God is the one placing the obstacle in our way. In the book of Hosea the Lord tells him to "take yourself a wife of harlotry" (Hosea 1:2) In chapter 2, God speaks to the prophet about His unfaithful people, using Hosea's wife as an example, "Therefore, behold, I will hedge up your way with thorns, and wall her in, so she cannot find her paths. She will chase her lovers, but not overtake them; yes, she will seek them, but not find them. Then she will say, 'I will go and return to my first husband,' In this story God blocked the path of the unfaithful to get them to change course and lead them back to Him. 

God can also use obstacle to build our endurance and strength. Just like running a marathon takes endurance, an obstacle course, not only takes endurance, but strength and determination. Romans 5:3-4 states, "we also glory in tribulations, knowing that tribulation produces perseverance; and perseverance character; and character, hope." When we are face with obstacle and trials God can take those and produce character within us that reflects Him. 

Another way God can use the obstacle in our lives is to teach that He doesn't intend for us to do things alone. Many obstacles take more than one person to overcome and it is at those time that we reach out to one another for help. Ecclesiastes 4:9-11 "Two are better than one, because they have a good reward for their labor. For if they fall, one will lift up his companion. But woe to him who is alone when he falls, for he has no one to help him up. Again, if two lie down together, they will keep warm; but how can one be warm alone?Though one may be overpowered by another, two can withstand him. and a threefold cord is not easily broken"

Whatever the source of the obstacle it will still slow you down but it doesn't have to stop you.

As I look at each obstacle, I can choose to get discouraged and fall into the "woe is me" trap, or I can choose to press on. There is a little known verse in Jeremiah 12:5 : "If you run with the footmen, and they have wearied you, then how can you contend with the horses? And if in the land of peace, in which you trusted, they wearied you, then how will you do in the floodplain of the Jordan."

 I choose to contend with greater things and therefore I must press on, through, over, or around the obstacles placed in front of me. 

Take Time To Pull The Weeds

This has been a busy summer. I chose not to plant a vegetable garden because I knew I wouldn't have time to take care of it. My last post was about what I choose to cultivate, well it has also been a very hot and wet summer and because of the weather and my inaction weeds have overtaken my flower bed in front of my house. I didn't choose to cultivate those weeds, I actually planted some bulbs this spring. But because of my neglect the weeds have cultivated themselves, leaving little room for the beauty that I wanted to grow.

These weeds with the one lone flower trying to survive among them are so symbolic of our lives. There are many weeds in our lives that try to choke out the beauty, in order to battle them we must be diligent and stay on top of it. I have tried to pull weeds off and on this summer but haven't put much effort into it and this is now the result. Like these weeds, there may be things in our lives that we know shouldn't be there and we may casually confront them but if we don't get in there and pull up the whole root it will return with a vengeance.

I noticed a few thing about the  circumstances in which these weeds have prospered. First I have been busy. I didn't stop and take the time to pull them when they were few and small because I thought other things were more important. Now the weeds are screaming at me every time I pull in the driveway. It is much easier to deal with issues and "weeds" in our lives before they take over the entire garden. Eventually they have to get pulled, better to stop and take the time early than putting it off.

Second, I didn't put more mulch down this year. I didn't, for various reasons, update my protective barrier against the weeds. How many times do we let the barriers in our lives go outdated. "I mulched a couple of years ago, it can wait one more year." or so I told myself. Now I have a mess to clean up because I didn't protect things in the first place.  Proverbs 13:6 says "Righteousness guards him whose way is blameless, but wickedness overthrows the sinner." We need to make sure we renew our "mulch" of righteousness so that the weeds cannot overthrow  us.

Third, the weeds are more relentless this year than I have ever seen. I can only assume that the rain and heat that we have had this year have contributed to the problem. Rains come in life, sometimes they are rains of blessing but often times they are the rains of troubles and trials. If we do not stay on top of our thoughts and our actions the weeds of worry and stress can overtake us. Add to the rains the heat and it may be unbearable to try to clear them out, but we must persevere or be overtaken.

Now as I attempt to tackle this undertaking of pulling up each weed up by the root I am reminded how I need to be on guard in my own life. Making sure my "mulch is at an adequate depth for protection. And when a weed does pop back up because I may not have gotten the root I need to be quick to pull it up so that beauty may once again be the focus of my garden and not the weeds.

Choosing What I Cultivate

Be anxious for nothing, 

but in everything by prayer and supplication, with thanksgiving,

let your request be know to God; 

and the peace of God, which surpasses all understanding, 

will guard your hearts and mind in Christ Jesus. 

Finally, brethren, 

Whatever things are true,

whatever things are noble,

whatever things are just,

whatever things are pure,

whatever things are lovely.

whatever things are of good report,

if there be any virtue and if there is anything praiseworthy-

meditate on these things

Philippians 4:6-8

I am heart broken, not at the state of the world we live in, for that I have hope, because we were told these thing would happen and we were told that Christ "overcame the world. I am heart broken and convicted for myself and for my brothers and sisters in Christ who have been sucked into the enemies schemes via social media. We are to be the light of the world yet we ourselves are feeding into the agenda of division. 

Yes the world is in bad shape and we cant hide our heads in the sand. But we cannot join the world in negativity and fear when we hold Truth and the Love of Christ for a broken and dying world. We must educate ourselves with Truth and arm ourselves with the Armor of God. 

As I look at social media all I see is anger, hate, division, and criticisms. Just a couple of years ago I cleaned up my news feed so that I was seeing godly posts from godly people. Now, however, many of those same godly people have fallen to the ways of the world and the news media. Jumping on the band wagon of hate, criticism, division, and anger. I myself have been guilty of this. 

Today I listened to a sermon from Kris Vallotton from Bethel Church and was convicted. One quote from the sermon was, "what I cultivate, dominates". What are we cultivating? Are we seeking out the "good reports" or are we sharing the glaring criticisms. The enemy is reeking havoc in our country and I, for one, refuse to agree with him.

We are told in Philippians 4:6 to "be anxious for nothing"; when you look at your news feed on your social media, do you get anxious? "I have overcome the world", Jesus told us. So why are we agreeing with the enemy instead of obeying our Lord Jesus Christ? Why are we not giving everything, through prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, to God? Have we forgotten the God we serve and how powerful He is? Do you refuse His peace when you give your worries to Him? 

I choose to believe God who says He will give us "peace which surpasses all understanding" (Phil 4:7) I know My God is bigger than all the fear, hate and division that we see in the world today. I choose to cultivate things that are true, noble, just, pure, lovely, and of good report. I will seek out the virtue and proclaim the praiseworthy. I wont bury my head in the sand but I will dwell in the arms of My Heavenly Daddy knowing He is in control and He has already won. 

No longer will I cultivate the loss of hope, the hate, the division, and the criticisms. I will not agree with the enemy and let fear in. 

I will lift my eyes to the hills- from whence comes my help?

My help comes from the Lord, who made heaven and earth.

He will not allow 'my' foot to be moved. He who keeps 'me' 

will not slumber.

Behold, He who keeps Israel (His people) shall neither slumber nor sleep.

The Lord is 'my' keeper; 

The Lord is 'my' shade at 'my' right hand.

The sun shall not strike 'me' by day , nor the moon by night. 

The Lord shall preserve 'me' from evil, He shall preserve 'my' soul.

The Lord shall preserve 'my' going out and 'my' coming in. 

From this time forth and even forevermore.

Psalm 121

Clear the Stage - Crush the Idols

Four years ago I posted a song on Facebook and today it popped up in my timeline memories.

It is a powerful song that spoke to me then and even reminds me today. The bridge of the song goes like this.

Anything I put before my God is an idol

Anything I want with all my heart is an idol. 

Anything I can’t stop thinking of is an idol.

Anything I give all my heart to is an idol.

We talk in the church about putting God first, but those lyrics really got me thinking about how easy idols sneak into our lives. In our minds we think that idols are bad things but when you look at it in this way you realize that we can make an idol out of really good things.

How many of us say we don't have time to do devotions? We let the day to day tasks and responsibilities come before God. I've written, before, about making room for God and how He wants us to put Him before anything else, that includes our families, our jobs, our  "to do" lists, and even our recreational activities. 

How many of us have wanted something with all our hearts? Maybe it was a dream job, or a dream wedding, or a child, or a spouse; the list can go on. These are all good things and it is not bad to want them. They become idols when we put them as a priority. We must keep it in perspective and desire God more than anything else.

How many of us have things in our lives that we can’t stop thinking of? Young people, watch yourselves here, how much are you thinking of that girl or boy you like? For us that are more mature, how much are we thinking of our worries and responsibilities? “How am I going to pay the bills this month?” or “How am I going to get my ‘to do’ list done?” How often do we think of God during the day? Do you give Him your few minutes and go on your way with your day or is He continually in your thoughts? When the worries or “to do” lists pop up, are you giving it to Him and thinking about who He is and how He’s got you.

How many of us have given all of our love to our husbands and our children? We spend so much time taking care of our kids that we don’t spend time with Jesus. We look to our spouses or boyfriend/girlfriend to fulfill the needs and desires that only our Heavenly Father can fill.

On Sundays (or Saturdays) we go to church and sing praises to Him, but like the song says, “we can sing all we want to and still get it wrong”.

So its time to “clear the stage”. Take time this week to “take a break from all the plans you have made and sit at home, alone and wait for God to whisper.” Clear away the busyness and things that steal your thoughts and let God reveal those things you have turned into an idol. Sometimes an idol isn’t a bad thing in and of itself but it becomes an idol because of the importance we put on it. Anything we put before God is an idol.

“Clear the stage and set the sound and lights ablaze 

if that’s the measure you must take to crush the idols.”

Ezekiel 14:2-6  And the word of the Lord came to me, saying,

 “Son of man, these men have set up their idols in their hearts, and put before them that which causes them to stumble into iniquity. Should I let myself be inquired of at all by them? 

“Therefore speak to them, and say to them, ‘

Thus says the Lord God: “Every one of the house of Israel who sets up his idols in his heart, and puts before him what causes him to stumble into iniquity, and then comes to the prophet, I the Lord will answer him who comes, according to the multitude of his idols, that I may seize the house of Israel by their heart, because they are all estranged from Me by their idols.”

“Therefore say to the house of Israel, 

‘Thus says the Lord God:

 “Repent, turn away from your idols, and turn your faces away from all your abominations.

Matthew 22: 37-38 Jesus said to him, 

“ 'you shall love the Lord your God with all your heart,

 with all your soul, 

and with all your mind’ 

this is the first and great commandment.”

1 John 5:19-21  We know that we are of God, 
and the whole world lies under the sway of the wicked one. 
And we know that the Son of God has come and has given us an understanding, 
that we may know Him who is true; 
and we are in Him who is true, in His Son Jesus Christ. 
This is the true God and eternal life.  
Little children, keep yourselves from idols.  Amen.

The Word of Testimony

God has been speaking a lot to me, lately, about being a living sacrifice and a living testimony. He has been reminding me of the promises He has made and given to me and the miracle HE has already done. This world can be such a discouraging place and we can get so wrapped up in the negativity. The one place of refuge we have is with Him. God’s word is living and breathing but many Christians have grown stagnant in their devotion times. During my devotions the other day I had a goal of reading 1 John 1, but God decided to stop me after verse 4. Let me walk you through what happened that day in hopes that it will change the way you read the Word and let God speak to you.

 1 John1:1-4 (NIV)

“That which was from the beginning, which we have seen with our eyes, which we have looked at and our hands have touched- this we proclaim concerning the Word of Life. The Life appeared; we have seen it and testify to it, and we proclaim to you the eternal life, which was with the Father and has appeared to us. We proclaim to you what we have seen and heard, so that you also may have fellowship with us and our fellowship is with the Father and with His Son Jesus Christ, we write to make our joy complete.”

As I read the passage I realized that I could read it as one looking at someone else’s story, or I can look at it as if I was the one writing the story. So I decided to go back and re-read it in first person. I have used a similar technique when I pray scripture over people, but for some reason I never really used it for me.

1 John 1:1 “That which was from the beginning, which ‘I’ have heard, which ‘I’ have seen with ‘my’ eyes, which ‘I’ have looked at and ‘m’ hands have touched – this ‘I’ proclaim concerning the Word of life.”

By looking at these verses in this way I am forced to reflect on what God has done in my life. What have I seen of Jesus in my life, with my own eyes? What have I looked at and touched that was from God?

1 John 1:2 “The life appeared; ‘I’ have seen it and testify to it, and ‘I’ proclaim to you the eternal life, which was with the Father and has appeared to ‘me’”.

“The Life” was presented to me through the Word at a young age but it was the “Word made flesh” living in and through those who believe that convinced me of the Truth.

Jesus is the Word made flesh but when we accept Him and accept the gift that He came and sacrificed Himself for me and then comes and lives in us (Col. 1:27), we then become the word made flesh when we begin to apply the Word and surrender to His perfect will.

1 John 1:3 “’I’ proclaim to you that ‘I’ have seen and heard, so that you also may have fellowship with ‘me’. And ‘my’ fellowship is with the Father and with His Son Jesus Christ”

As I reflect on that verse, I remember things that I have seen and words that God has spoken to me. Making it personal, I look at my testimony. I can read theses verses and look at what God did thousands of years ago, among a group of people I have no physical connection to, but I think that He wants me to make it personal. He wants me to stop and reflect on what I have seen and heard.

I have witnessed His healing power, I have been the recipient of His miraculous provision and His restoration. I have heard Him speak to me and I have even felt His arms around me. To me these are not just words on the pages of a book, it has become reality.

The things I have seen or heard are not just for me. I have went through times in my walk with Him that I have boldly proclaimed what He has done for me, but then at other times I have grown stagnant.  I am reminded in verse 3 that it is for you that I give my testimony of what Jesus has done in and through my life, so that you too can have fellowship with Him. Since it is required of me to share my testimony, I must spend time reflecting on what Christ has done for me and is doing for me. Why?

1 John 1:4 “’I’ write this to make our joy complete.”

New King James says, “to make ‘your’ joy complete", but I like the “our” in NIV. When I share my personal experiences and encounters with Christ it makes “my” joy complete, but it also gives others hope and encouragement and hopefully at times sets them free. This bring joy to them.

Revelation 12:11 says, "And they overcame him by the blood of the Lamb and the word of their testimony, and they did not love their lives to the death."

We overcome not only by the blood of Jesus, which was poured out for All of us, but we overcome by the word of OUR testimony. God still moves, miracles still happen, He still speaks. We can have daily fellowship with Him thanks to the sacrifice of His Son on a cross and His resurrection. It is our duty as disciples and followers of Christ to share our personal testimonies. We need to share what God is doing in our lives. The world doesn't need or want a god that moved a couple thousand years ago, they need the Living God of the Universe that still moves and lives today. The best way for them to see Him is to see Him moving in our lives, but they won't see if we don't share. So spend time reflecting on what God has done and is doing for you and get out there and share it. 

I Have Tasted

Fifteen years ago this month Jason and I decided to take a weekend away from the kids. We lived in Texas at the time and we decided to visit a bed and breakfast in Ardmore, Oklahoma. Now there really isn’t much to do in Ardmore, but the whole reason for the weekend was to get away from the busyness and the kids. Even though I really don’t remember a whole lot about the weekend, I know we enjoyed the relaxation, and one thing has stood out to me for 15 years. The breakfast at Shiloh Morning Inn. They served Banana Fosters pancakes with pecans. I will never forget the taste, I have searched for something like it ever since.

Once you get a taste of something amazing you always want more, or at least you should. Jason and I were given a taste of what a godly marriage looks like and even though old habits sneak back in and things may have slipped, I have always craved and hungered for what we had a taste of. It makes us strive every day to get it back or maintain it when we find it again.

We also got the opportunity to taste what "church family" looks like. We were blessed to experience an atmosphere where we could be ourselves and not have to put on face. Everyone was genuine and loving and cared about each other. But even as the world has break-ups in families, so does the church and our wonderful family soon split up. Even though we went through the pain, we tasted what church should be and we hunger for it.

Jesus himself said in Matthew 5:6 “Blessed are those who hunger and thirst for righteousness, for they shall be filled; and in John 6:35 “I am bread of life. He who comes to Me shall never hunger and he who believes in Me shall never thirst.” He planted in each one of us a hunger for something more. 

Then he gives us a taste.

I have heard many stories of revival. When I first started hearing the stories I honestly didn’t fully believe them. I grew up in the church, but it was a powerless church where you went every Sunday like the good little Christian and gave your offering and sang the songs out of the hymnal. Then, God gave me a taste.

He gave me a taste of the Living Word. The word that gave promises and actually fulfilled them. The Word that spoke directly to my heart and sometimes even cut straight through to clean out what wasn’t meant to be there. The word that encouraged me and taught me and strengthened me.

Then He gave me a taste of true worship. Music had always spoken to me, but one day I realized it wasn’t the music, it was God using the music. He gave me a taste of worship without music and as I worshiped my thirst was quenched.  

As I hungered for more, at a women’s conference, He gave me a taste of His heart for the lost. It was so strong and painful that it pushed me to the floor crying out for them to know Him. I was given a taste of what He feels for those who have walked away from Him; it was a taste of His hunger for us. After that I wanted even more. I had tasted His love and knew there was more. I began to get restless and would hear more stories of people who had had visions or encounters with Him. I Hungered for that. I would look around and see the people around me, comfortable with what they were getting in church, but I had tasted and I was hungry. I wasn’t satisfied; I knew there was more.

A few years went by with God giving me a taste here and a taste there and with every taste I wanted more. Then, in December 2012, He gave me a taste of revival. He gave me a taste of healing; being healed myself and then watching others be healed. During the hustle and bustle of the holiday season He gave me a taste of what Christmas was truly about. He gave me a taste of what happened when we drop everything just to be in the Presence of God. I knew what it felt like to be in a room where the presence of God was so thick you could no longer stand. Then on one of the many nights we were there, He gave me a taste of joy. Pure, unrestrained joy. The kind of joy where you laugh so hard and for so long your abs and cheeks hurt and tears are rolling down your cheeks, and when you think you can finally catch your breath the laughter starts again. (It’s the only ab workout I enjoy).  

On Valentine’s Day 2013 He gave me a taste of being used by Him. That was our Valentine's date, spending time in the presence of God. I was on the floor during worship unable to stand. I was able to get to my chair but during the teaching I was asked to come up front and pray for someone. I was still really shaky and couldn't stop laughing and  all I could think was, "how am I .supposed walk the few few feet with these wobbly legs?" I managed to stand and with Jason behind me in case I fell I worked my way up front. All I could do was extend my hands and laugh with what felt like electricity pulsing through me. God healed the lady that night and and put me back on the floor. During my time laying on the floor, I realized my identity. I was given a taste of how God can use someone so unworthy and unqualified.

After a few months, things began to die down and most people went back to life as usual, but God had given us a taste. When you are given a taste you crave more. There have been many moves of God, big and small and with each move God gives us a taste of the kingdom. With each taste we get, we should want more. He says “blessed are those who hunger”. I hunger. I hunger to see a church laid out under the Presence of God. I hunger to see children so bold and moved by God that they are praying for their friends in school and bringing them to church. I hunger to be interrupted to do the will of God on this earth. I hunger to see the Gods people surrendered to His Glory and His will.

Many people hunger for the Kingdom of God. Too many in the church believe they cant experience the Kingdom until Jesus returns, but I have seen and witnessed when the Kingdom breaks through and people are never the same. I long to see complacency die in the body  and passion burn. I thirst for His Presence and hunger for His righteousness. I have tasted and I want more.

Now when He was asked by the Pharisees when the kingdom of God would come, He answered them and said, “The kingdom of God does not come with observation;  nor will they say, ‘See here!’ or ‘See there! ’For indeed, the kingdom of God is within you.”- Luke 17:20-21

Speak the Truth

Everywhere I look lately I am bombarded by false truth and false teaching and white washed religion. It’s all over the media, it’s in conversations, it’s on the internet. I have read so many article and reports and actually witnessed controversy in the church over the last year that it saddens me. The church is under attack when it stands on truth, yet I feel that more people in the church need to be boldly speaking the truth. The church has gotten really good at sugar coating the truth and walking on tip toes, when people are walking in sin and dying right outside their doors. 

I even see it in my own life with people telling me not to be so harsh; it makes me stop constantly and question my conviction, and then I get mad at myself for doubting truth. I received a word several months ago to “speak the truth, boldly”, followed by many devotion times when the Spirit would lead me to verses about speaking truth, speaking out against the mainstream and standing up, even when you are the only one standing. I was reminded over and over again to pick up my cross and follow Him.

As I began to search out what “picking up my cross” meant for me personally and to search what God was calling me to, I realized it was His way of asking me if I was “all in”. Was I ready to carry my cross (pain, suffering, rejection) in order to follow Him? Following Christ is not always easy, especially in today’s world. He gives us hints of what it will cost in His Word - Matthew 7:13-14 “Enter by the narrow gate; for wide is the gate and broad is the way that leads to destruction, and there are many who go in by it. Because narrow is the gate and difficult is the way which leads to life, and there are few who find it.” This verse tells us it will be lonely and difficult.

A lot of people in the church believe that being a Christian is all about loving one another, which I totally agree that loving each other is first and foremost. After all Jesus Himself, told us several times to “love one another” (John 13:34-35; John 15:12; John 15:17). The problem, however comes, when we ask "what is love and how is it walked out?"

I believe we will never truly understand what love is until we get to heaven, but here on earth I believe letting someone stay in a destructive, unhealthy pattern, or not speaking up against outright sins, is not love.

Repentance was a huge part of the ministry of Jesus. As a Christian we are called to die to ourselves (Philippians 1:21) and be born again (John 3:3, 3:5-7). When we truly come to Christ we are a “new creation, the old has gone and the new has come” (2 Corinthians 5:17). To me, that means a turning away of our own patterns, and stepping into His. It’s not love when we see a brother or sister in Christ, falling into their old patterns instead of following what they know to be true, and we remain silent. We are to encourage each other to walk on the narrow path but when we see someone stepping off that path and we remain silent and do nothing to correct them; that is not love.

We worry so much about offending, that we choose to let people continue in their destructive ways and even die in their sin. The truth can be offensive and most of the time people don’t want to hear it. Jesus always spoke the truth to people, and there were some that received it and others who waked away. Then there were those that were so offended that they conspired to shut the Truth up for good.

 I find that as I continue to speak truth and stand on the Word of God, it becomes a lonely place in this world and it is sad to see. I can only continue to pray that I will continue to conform to His will and not the pattern of this world; that when I am meet with those that do not wish to receive truth then I am quick to “brush the dust off my feet” (Luke 9:5) and move on; that if those that say they love me, see me faltering they speak truth. I continue to pray that I do not get offended by those who refuse to repent and that I let Him cast the judgment, not myself. It is a corrupt and sinful world and we the church are the only light they have, so we need to shine bright, the light of truth, no matter what comes against us.

Refining Out the Impurities

God has been turning up the heat and bringing a lot of impurities to the surface to burn them out. One of the major impurities He has brought up in me is my lack of trust. My lack of trust in people, and my lack of trust in Him. Though I still trust in the promises of God, I have realized that my trust in the process and my trust in my own gift of discerning and hearing His voice has diminished.

Because of everything that has happened in our lives over the past year, I began to doubt that I had heard God correctly. I don't doubt His will, but I confess that I have doubted my ability to discern His will. I also forgot, or should I say I didn't connect the dots of what has happened to the time before all of this that God gave me a choice. I could have taken a different path. He didn't show me what I was to walk through but He did reveal it would not be an easy path. He asked if I was willing to pay the price of following Him? At the time I was like, "Yes, God. I will pay any price." Then the time came for me to pay up. In the moment, I didn't see that what we were going through was a process of paying the price. 

At the time I knew that God had told me to stand up (1 Samuel 1:9 NIV), stand on (Habakkuk 2:1; 2 Thessalonians 2:15), and speak the truth (Ephesians 4:25). He told me that He was sending me to a "stubborn and obstinate people" (Ezekiel 2:4). I knew at the time the truth I was to speak would not be well received. I was willing to pay the price and long as it was only me to get hurt, then I saw the true "cost" of innocent people getting hurt, friendships lost and offenses toward others began taking root in myself and those around me. 

I've struggled the last few months, questioning, "did I hear God correctly?" "did I speak the truth out of love?" I can answer "yes" to both of those questions, but what I didn't realize is that by asking them, I let doubt in. There is nothing wrong with questioning your decisions, especially when the outcome is not what was expected, but when we know we did the right thing and still say, "but, what if..?", then we invite the enemy to come in and destroy our trust.

That is why I have been so silent lately. "Who am I to say these things?" "I spoke up and look what happened, people got hurt". These are just a couple of the lies the enemy has been whispering in my ear. I listened to a sermon today and it was just another pieces added to the puzzle of my healing. (Bridgeway's Stance on Hyper Grace - Chad Norris) Between that sermon, the cleansing stream study we are going through, and God revealing things to me through His word and close friends; it makes me realize that, yes, people got hurt because of the truth being spoken, I am sorry for that and I feel their pain (so much so I even took on their offenses as well as my own). The truth is offensive and often times when the truth is spoken impurities are forced out into the light. The impurities were already there, within myself and others, the truth just brought them up to be dealt with. It is then, when the impurities are exposed that it is up to the individual to decide what they are going to do with it. I cannot be held accountable for how others choose to react, I can only control how I react. 

I confess, it's been a roller coaster ride. At first I was o.k. (I hadn't seen the impurities yet), I knew I had followed God's will. I didn't understand the outcome but I trusted God that His hands were in it. Then, over time, I didn't hear anything from God, I thought that he had placed me in the desert to journey through what had happened. Only recently, did I come to the realization, with the help of Holy Spirit, that I had placed myself in the desert because of my doubt in hearing and discerning God's will for my life. 

Since that realization, I have confessed my lack of trust in God and in my lack of trust in my gift of discerning His will. I am now in the process of finding those doors in my past where mistrust has entered and closing them for good, with the help of Jesus. 

Had God shown me then, what the cost was going to be for my obedience, I honestly don't think I would have taken the same steps. Knowing what I know now, however, would I do the same thing? I would say, without hesitation, yes! Even though so many people got hurt, I have to trust God and trust that He knows what he is doing? No matter how painful this has been, it has brought things to the surface that needed to be brought into the light and burned out. Purification is, often times, a painful process. Just as we have to prune a plant so that it can be healthier and bear more fruit, God sometimes has to prune us. But there is comfort in knowing that it is for His glory and our benefit. There is comfort in knowing that He never leaves us or forsakes us. I have seen so much proof of that over the past few months. 

I thought God wasn't speaking to me, yet now that my ears are unblocked I can look back and see where He was never silent, I just couldn't hear Him through the doubt and through the offenses

Thank You, Lord for being there and allowing me this journey because without it true healing would not be able to come. Thank you, Lord, for letting me have my time in the pit to wallow but then pulling me out and not leaving me there. Thank You for the loving ways You stir up the impurities of doubt, mistrust, and offense, so they can be purged out. Thank You for the truth of Your Word, though is cuts like a sword, cutting away anything that is not from You, new growth appears leaving us healthier and stronger.

It reminds me of the rose out in front of my house. We used to have a tree in the front yard that shaded it and no matter what I did, I couldn't get it to grow. We had to take down the tree because of carpenter ants and the rose took off and thrived in the sunlight. So much so that it began to grow wildly and wouldn't stay contained to the trellis we have placed to give it support. It began to grow into the walk way and was getting in the way of those wanting to enter. This year we pruned it way back, so far back I worry that it was too much, but just a few days ago I looked at it and saw the new buds and new growth. I am confident it is going to flourish and be healthier because we cur it back. I may be wrong because we are only human, but When God prunes we can trust that He knows what He is doing. In His wisdom He never prunes too much and always prunes the proper amount at the right time. Though it is painful, in the end we will be beautiful plants that will bear much fruit.

1 John 1:9

If we confess our sins, he is faithful and just and will forgive us our sins and purify us from all unrighteousness.

1 Peter 1:6-7

In all this you greatly rejoice, though now for a little while you may have had to suffer grief in all kinds of trials. These have come so that the proven genuineness of your faith—of greater worth than gold, which perishes even though refined by fire—may result in praise, glory and honor when Jesus Christ is revealed.